"And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not. As we have therefore opportunity, let us do good unto all men, especially unto them who are of the household of faith." Galatians 6:9-10 (NIV)
It seems that the longer the struggles go on; with getting the financials in order, the stressed relationship with my son and the distancing relationship with my daughter, and the woeful outlook to transferring to a job closer to my new home and community, the harder it gets to be 'cheerful' in the face of another day of long commutes, demands of others, and the various brush fires that seem to dominate anyone's day.
It is very easy to want to push all the 'good' stuff that I am involved in away; the Awakened Heart's ministry, the leadership training, church, devotions, and even writing in this blog. I have convinced myself, in these times that no one really reads them, or reads them and doesn't get anything from them (which are the true purpose of my desire to write). It doesn't matter, because the world continues to slide headlong into the moral corruptness that is the signature of the enemy, the Christian faith continues to water itself down (being more of the world than of Christ), and the dream of following God's purposed reason for my life seems so distant.
But I know God is present in this season and I know that to Him all allegiance I owe and have promised. If I can expect Him to fulfill His promises, then I must and desire to fulfill mine to Him. It is a result of living in the light of God's grace.
"If we are living in the light of God's presence, just as Christ is, then we have fellowship with each other, and the blood of Jesus, His Son, cleanses us from every sin." 1 John 1:7 (NLT)
I am far from perfect, far from being the man that God designed, purposed, and expects me to be. Like a patient Father, of which I fail at being more often than I like, God keeps the vision of who and what I am in the fullness of this life in the center of His eye, shaping and molding me from who I currently am. I may feel unworthy, but I know that God sees me better than I see myself.
In my struggles, I don't want to try and 'store up' those things against a 'rainy day', but rather simply bring all things in my life into alignment to serving God's purpose. It would be nice, real nice, to have no worries about making the rent, paying my debts, and being able to drive a car that has less miles on it than my age when I buy it. It would be great to be totally healthy, without the chronic conditions I have or any illness I may yet experience. It would be wonderful to simply fill out the request chit and have my desires and wants fulfilled (from that 'by-the-door' parking slot to the 'right-thing-to-say' to my children in their needs).
As Matthew Henry says, "It is the folly of most men, to mind and pursue that which is for the body and for time only, more than that for the soul and eternity."
"But God said to him, You fool! This very night they [the messengers of God] will demand your soul of you; and all the things that you have prepared, whose will they be?" Luke 12:20 (AMP)
Happiness and comfort that relies upon this world's ability to fulfill them is so temporary as to be worthless in the pursuit of it to a wise man. Short term gain, long term loss…..such thinking shows the foolishness of such a worldly person with "has no grateful regard to the providence of God, nor any right thought of the uncertainty of human affairs, the worth of his soul, or the importance of eternity." (Matthew Henry CC)
God has His plan, often contrary to our own desires and goals (which are often carnal in nature), and He makes full use of our subjection of free will to His. We can only listen for His call and follow in His path, for we are linear in nature and cannot see the future.
"DO NOT boast of [yourself and] tomorrow, for you know not what a day may bring forth." Proverbs 27:1 (AMP)
I think I'll trust in God to work out His plan for me and keep doing what He teaches in His Scripture to be 'of His own heartfelt desires'………..
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